THE INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN TRAUMATIC – 419

“No, no, no, no, nooooo!” Chloroph exclaims as the other boxes holding the platform together swiftly separate one by one to follow their pal to its fate and be gulped inside the Hook and, caught in the bizarre circumstances, in a dangerous act of bravado, Chloroph attempts to catch an unguarded CollectOrus with one arm as he falls inside the Hook, only to lose balance too and become trapped by its pull.

“Get out of—”

are the last words the Captain and his crew hear before Birdseye catches the floating, burping Hook, zips it securely and throws it into the darkness deep into oblivion.

“For good,” Birdseye says.

“Is that all there is to it?” Labaguette wonders aloud.

“My crown?” the King insists as the Monkeys unfold all the sails, perching on the mast high above.

“Shut up, we lost two weird but useful creatures!” Labaguette says, hopping on the deck, proudly displaying two of Birdseye’s majestic feathers planted on his bare wings.

“Time to move on” Captain Traumatic says, “let’s get out of this hell hole!”

In a second or less, depending on how you look at it, and it may be an eternity to some, the Insatiable Princess travels as far away as to get somewhere, anywhere that is inaccessible to filth, space junk and dead ends.  It is a new dawn for her and her crew and the bright inviting horizon line propels them far, far and away in no time, no time at all.  Soon, they are far and beyond and Labaguette is growing a silky, smooth and thin coat of feathers.  Soon, they enter a shadowy realm made of haze, mist and fogs of varying thickness, structure, shades and colours.

“Do I smell smoke?” the Captain asks.

To be continued…

THE INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN TRAUMATIC – 418

And so, a new seed is born out of Chloroph’s fingernails as he shows it off with a menacing stare.

Captain Traumatic clicks his fingers and at once the hovering boxes unite as a platform that slides under Chloroph’s and CollectOrus’ feet.  Then, the platform, like a thick and compact Eastern flying carpet, sets off sluggishly towards the remaining filthy trail.

“Spread the news!” the Captain tells them, “we’ve got Rum, you’ve got Hooks and filth collecting ideas.  Find the crowds and I’ll strike deals with you.  We’ll distribute Rum to those you send us and we’ll provide you with empty barrels, dead alien material and body parts to toy with and create.”

“You know I will not be able to find you,” Chloroph remarks.

The Captain pulls a golden button from his jacket and throws it at Chloroph who catches it, nods and looks at it as if perhaps it might be made of the most precious metal he’s ever seen.

“Only a button,” he concludes.

“It’ll give you hope.”

“What do you take me for?”

“It’s a link.  When you see it shine, you’ll know where to find me.”

“Mate, your parrot is without feathers and you still believe we’re in a fairy tale?”

Incensed, Chloroph prepares to jump aboard the ship from his platform holding an open Hook ready to engulf the Captain in it but in doing so, Chloroph slips, separating the last black box from the platform which falls into the Hook.

To be continued…

THE INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN TRAUMATIC – 417

“Which direction?” Chloroph asks.

“The dirt trail,” CollectOrus says.

“It’s scattered, it’s everywhere, really, I—”

“—MONKEYS!” the Captain yells.

“Towards the magnet,” CollectOrus says.

“AHOY!  BRING THE SAILS DOWN!”

“We’ll get hopelessly pulled,” Chloroph says.

“Where to?” Labaguette asks.

“Birdseye,” the Captains says, “take us back to Earth!”

There, in the midst of a junk filled space, a majestic ship sets sails once more, free of bounds and ready to get back to its original port where she may find peace roaming the familiar seas of her world and distribute her precious rum cargo to those who can pay the price.  She will be pampered, loved and cherished for her secrets.  Her new masts will sparkle of a thousand incrusted diamonds and her sails’ thread will be made of fine gold.

“What about us?” CollectOrus asks.

“You’ve decided of your own fate,” the Captain says.

“Stop the ship, we need time to consider!”

“Make up your mind,” the Captain says, “Princess! Halt!”

With excessive reluctance and discontentment, the Insatiable Princess stops abruptly, jolting her contents to unrest.  In a second, a number of black boxes saved and stored inside the hull from the aftermath of the extinct RythmaRymosthesis hover above them.

“Here,” the Captain says, “a token of my gratitude.  You may fly with them, experiment with them or treat them as your own kind, what you will.”

“This is rather expedient.  They came of their own accord, they were disturbed” CollectOrus remarks.

“Get off my ship once and for all!” the Captain orders.

“I saved you more than once,” Chloroph remarks, “I could take it back.”

“Take it back?  Take it back? Take what back?” the Captain asks.

To be continued…

THE INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN TRAUMATIC- 416

“Now, ridiculous Bird,” Chloroph says, approaching Labaguette with an indecent amount of threat shining in his green eye, “all you’ve got left to cover your insides is your skin and I—”

“—A duty of honour,” Birdseye intervenes, stopping Chloroph in time before he engulfs Labaguette in his newly devised Instant-Trickster-Hook, “it is an honourable and recommended task to help CollectOrus here present to gather and dispose of Universal Rubbish wherever it may be floating to and from, irrespective of origins, background, shape and colour.  Thou shalt devise the best Bin-Bag out of your Hooks.”

“All I do is plant seeds,” Chloroph insists, “and nothing more.  Besides, what makes you think that I—”

“—Hook seeds that open new worlds, new dimensions and new universes.  You are a multi-universal creator of a kind,” Birdseye insist at the same time as Captain Traumatic rolls his eyes in disdain.

“Really?” Chloroph asks, suspicion lining his forehead while looking at CollectOrus’s inviting smile.

“Without you, we would never have discovered as much as we have,” Birdseye says as the Captain’s eyes have never been darker, “you’ve opened our imag—”

“—One must not procrastinate in these latitudes,” CollectOrus objects, “it is time to make room for the unknown and be creative.”

“Room for the unknown?” Labaguette inquires.

“I would gladly team up with you, Chloroph.” CollectOrus adds, “we need to devise ways to manage Universal space junk and to make it disappear through the proper use of all-encompassing binbags under your supervision; think about it: your creative business and mine intermingled and associated.  You, a plant man, Hook TM creator extraordinaire and I, I, —”

“—And CollectOrus, BinBag Master & Propeller!” Birdseye says.

“—Prop—”

“A shit load of words and more words!” The Captain interjects, exasperated.

To be continued…

THE INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES OF CAPTAIN TRAUMATIC – 415

The Captain, standing on the edge of the ship and holding on to a rope reads a page of his book:

“’Watch out for your next step.  It may never end.’”

“Ha, ha, ha!” Labaguette says.

“A crownless King is a commoner,” the King reads aloud as Labaguette is now rolling on the ship’s floor.

“A featherless bird cannot fly,” Birdseye adds.

“HEY YOU!  Just because you plucked my feathers doesn’t mean you can invent a page!  You can’t see, you can’t read and you can’t fly!” Labaguette says, “why would you—.”

“—I will be able to fly sometime,” Birdseye says.  “I have feathers,” he continues, caressing one of his golden wings.  “You have real wings.  I have real feathers.”

“Where are we headed, Captain?” Chloroph interrupts.

“You’re a fricking dreaming nut!” Labaguette exclaims.

“I need dropped off around here,” CollectOrus claims, “but I require a bin bag.  My job doesn’t end here.”

“I shall pull my best and plant it on you,” Birdseye says.

“Stop talking all at the same time, it is confusing!” the Captain yells.

“It’s worth experimenting,” Chloroph says.

“You can’t fly!” Labaguette insists.

“You wouldn’t have a spare bin creating Hook, would you?” CollectOrus asks.

“It’s worth a try.  I think I know,” Birdseye says.

“You—”

“—Labaguette!” Captain Traumatic commands, “get back to perch on Birdseye’s shoulders and let him stick a feather or two on your wings!  Chloroph!” he continues, “you shall remain with CollectOrus and work with him on a Hook to collect rubbish in the way he was accustomed to!”

“I’ve better things to do than to—”

“—He’ll have you thrown out of the ship!” Labaguette retorts, perched once more on Birdseye’s wing’s tip.”

To be continued…